Dear Muse…Where the Hell Are You?

"Hesiod and the Muse" by Gustave Moreau
“Hesiod and the Muse” by Gustave Moreau

Dear Muse,
I just want to say that I am really looking forward to our work today. I have quite a number of amazing ideas I want to run by you and get working on. I think they have the potential to be some of my best stuff. As soon as you get here we’ll start crackin’. This is going to be off the hook!

Affectionately yours,
Ron

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Dear Muse,
Hey, it’s been a couple of hours since I wrote. Did you get my note? I told you I have some really good ideas. I’m anxious to get started on these. Just waiting on you to show up. Let’s do this thing!

With anticipation,
Ron

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Dear Muse,
I stepped away from my desk for a while to grab a bite to eat and read a few magazines. Hey, have you read the latest issues of Wired, Fast Company and Filmmaker magazines lately? Some really good stuff in there. Gave me some more ideas. Just need my old partner to get her little butt over here so we can make some magic. Yeah, that would be you.😉

With love,
Ron

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Dear Muse,
I just finished watching Zacuto’s Critics, all 39 episodes of FilmFellas, the IFC channel, seventeen movie trailers, “Waiting for Guffman,” “The Big Picture,” “The Player,” all the bonus features on disc 2 of the “Social Network” Collector’s DVD set (twice), two-thirds of Fellini’s “8-1/2”, and all the opening scenes to Quentin Tarantino’s “Reservoir Dogs,” “Pulp Fiction,” “Kill Bill: Book 1” and a bootleg company of “Inglorious Bastards.” I still have not found you. I’m really getting worried now. Are you okay?

Sincerely concerned,
Ron

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Dear Muse,
Okay. My concern has just turned into anger. I just spent God knows how long watching six StillMotion videos, three Kevin Shahinian films, the collected shorts of Whitestone Motion Picutres, Jesse Rosten’s latest short, Kirby Ferguson’s “Everything is a Remix,” the good finalist entries in the Beyond the Still contest, and all the films in the “California is a Place” series (except that one about the guy who makes the life-sized sex dolls. That’s just creepy). Clearly you ARE actually working, just not with ME! WTF!

Confused and annoyed,
Ron

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Dear Muse,
I would like to point you to paragraph 3, of section XIV, sub-section 8.3 of our binding agreement that expressly states that you will work with me to create works of art that will inspire, encourage and entertain all who view it. That you will instill within me a sense of purpose and confidence. I don’t want to have to go “Boston Legal” on your a$$, but I will if I have to. I expect you to hold up to your agreement!

Cordially yours,
Ron

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Dear Muse,

I HATE you!

Ron

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Dear Muse,
Please forgive my last couple of notes. I’m just really frazzled.  A lot’s going on. I have all these bills to pay, the economy sucks, our vacuum cleaner is on the fritz and I have to drive all the way to Costco to return it, I got in a fight with my wife, I stubbed my toe, this whole Jesh de Rox thing…Ugh! Just so much weighing on my soul. I didn’t mean to take it out on you. Please forgive me.

Apologetically yours,
Ron

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Dear Muse,

It’s 3:45 a.m. I can’t wait around any longer. I don’t know what it is I did to offend you. But I hope to see you when I wake.

I forgive you.
Ron

12 thoughts on “Dear Muse…Where the Hell Are You?

  1. Dear Ron,

    You managed to get into my files and copy, pretty much word for word, every letter and note I’ve written to my muse lately .. that tease. Brazen hussy, I’d say. She’s probably off trying to get in with Patrick or Kevin. Well, except for ‘The Big Picture’, ‘8-1/2’ and the fact that only watched 7 movie trailers, it’s pretty much spot on.

    Oh well, I can’t be upset at you. It’s my muse that I’m upset at. You know, I’m just going to plow ahead. She’ll come running back once she sees me moving forward without her. Oh yes, she’ll be back.

    Good luck with your muse.

    Isabel

    P.S. Thanks for sharing. You’re a good muse substitute. 😉

    1. “She’ll come running back once she sees me moving forward without her. Oh yes, she’ll be back.”

      You are so correct Isabel. That is how she works. In the meantime, I’m glad I was able to be your surrogate muse.😉

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